It's really kind of funny how this picture has found it's way to me. I had just finally spoken to this guy that I've had some uncertainties with from the summer, I do like him, I just don't like how he handles his temper. His defensive mannerisms are to lash back, instill guilt, and deny any wrong doing on his part. Completely blind of his own faults. It's frustrating to see him point a finger at you, whereas you could say more, but then again, you're not him, for a good reason. And you'd like for him to be able to see how he's been. But how, but how indeed. I'm like this too though. Quite the temper, horribly destructive. But I choose who to show it to. Or, is it that I choose? It just happens. Most of it's been through indirect communication, at least at the physical level. Emails, letters, texts. I'm sort of a part of the generation like that. I suppose it's easier to get away with, so then it's not really recognized as wrong doing. Damn.
So I gave this to his friend before, then they partied, and he had it. Neat story really, it all made me smile. And then they split, then he has it, and he likes it, I enjoy how he likes it. Then we're in a bit of a cheese-stink of a situation. And then his friends see it, and post it up on the internet, I find it, the same day where we start to finally talk.. what is it, March? This was from August? I thought it was done, but he really needs to bring me down. It's disturbingly obvious. And this creates an ultimatum.
Whereas no matter how fantastical I might see him being, or being capable of being, if he acts wrongly, trying to guilt trip me, have me beg, have himself seen and admired once again, then my dear, I'm wrong - You're not worth it. I'll move on fine, sorta sad that it didn't work out. But I was trying, and you weren't. And that's where it ended. But even as I continue to think, I become more and more unsure of where I stand. I will wait, but I won't. I want to re-ignite the friendship, but I don't. I don't like all of him, but that's come out of the situations.
WWJD is definitely the symbolic question here, but I honestly couldn't even guess. If he doesn't recognized his problems, then he doesn't grow into a better person. I think that's where we differ. I will apologize, and he's not yet comfortable with doing so, with me at least. Ah, time. We'll just need to talk in person. Instead of this jab jab action.
